lighten up



Expert training and 

1. STRESS (internal) Managers.

Know thyself.

2. Environmental Sensitivity.

Know your place.

The benefits of quietude:

3. SACRIFICE could be stressful if you are not aware of the consequences.

+++What doesn’t kill you makes me stronger,. No pain, no gain.

The sacrifice of self to work can be stressful. Our American work ethic is at times so challenging and overwhelming that stress and disease override the challenge and the rewards – we work and shop until we drop…Dead! The work is so emotionally taxing you wouldn’t know it until it does lead to stress-related illnesses. Work preoccupies us, it consumes us, it rewards us…well it also stresses us to the point of disease….if we are not careful. long-suffering. martyrdom. really? NOT. A quote :”its one thing to be busy but what are you busy doing? ants are busy too. Thoreau

All sacrifice and no recreation could kill you as well. What is waking you up in the morning what is your internal alarm clock? What is stressing you out?

We work and medicate, sedate or the latest craze we rejuvenate with five hour and ten hour energy drinks with names like monster and redbull ensuring a competitive drive like an athlete on steroids. Must give us pause…..


Let me introduce you to meditation,  its history and failure to engage the American worker and consumer: aum mani padme hum. It’s the sixties and seventies, big wars in Vietnam, a cultural revolution of civil rights, womens right, march on Washington, riots….and East meets WEST,.

Or WEST meets EAST. The very Beatles that brought us “Help I need somebody Help” take a trip to India and come back in a “yellow submarine.”

College professors and hippies alike are consuming tabs of LSD to attain altered states of consciousness but some are “meditating” and trying to get a natural high from listening, deep breathing and chanting.

The benefits of meditation:

From TM to Om!

Everybody OM. Laughter. OMmmmmmm Ommmmmmm.Aum……..from your belly or at the top of your lungs.

5. Anger Management


Well one lady wasn’t buying it.

author of the Dance of Anger

NETWORK the movie

ANGER WEBSITE with solutions


Take a post it….write it down tear up and then rollup/mash up the newspaper into a ball and throw it at your object of affection.

Let It Go!

Did it really go anywhere? Maybe, but it has given us pause. Maybe the professor, the doctor, the pastor and enlightened friends were right when they said there’s a blessin’ in the lesson/

My professional work in conflict resolution and teaching marriage and family has taught me one fact: relationships are laden with conflict and love gets a bad rap sometime because love means having to communicate, having to tolerate, having to understand.

6. East Meets West: Zen and the birds of Appetite. Thomas Merton.

Yin and yang. And Cognitive dissonance. Thinking Tension.

Conflict breeds opportunity but must give us pause To THINK, count to ten. How we survive real life stressors: Death of a love one. Losses of all sorts. Family members moving on. When my wife left me for reasons beyond my efforts, I told people she passed on….to another guy. Our mutual friends and family didn’t appreciate the one liner but it helped me move on and now we are all one big happy “blended” family.

IMAGES of yinYang.

“deadlines and flatlines” will be transformed into benchmarks and heartbeats…..

solutions and not problems.

H and F video

Exercise: be a conductor. Cross the wires of your brain chemistry with natural remedies like exercise and dancing.

Body scan for stressors and release. Face……

Stand up and cross your arms like this. Qi Gong.

the ups and downs, the trajic - comedy that comes with life, the good the bad and the ugly. It’s all around us and stress release exercises give us the strength resiliency and tenacity to weather those storms: with life comes death but while we are here BE ALIVE!

7. Balance. Temperance. Moderation.

Example: a child at play skipping along into bliss and trips to find himself crying at the top of his lungs.

Let us take some images of some weird side effects of Stress before we proceed.

what my fellow wellness advocates and I are proposing and have been doing so since the seventies is Prevention.

My personal story from SUNY at Oswego: I had an identity crisis and drank myself into the counseling center and was introduced to "High Level Wellness" by Donald B. Ardell (one of the first primers on the subject).

The prevention of an aneurysm, or a heart attack, or a car accident or one drink or drug to many, suicide or even   homicide.

over indulgence in alcohol, nicotine, and overall junk that provides a buzz is usually followed by a dark cloud extremely cathartic…the HangOVer…the hoarse cough, ashy pale skin, the waste of money, blackouts and an overall lousy disposition…..which creates stress: guilt, regret and an emotional hangover.

However, Stress releasing behaviors can become habit forming and deliberate in finding Recreation that engages and leads to a long healthy life.


8. Fact:

Exercise: jump up and down.

Be Happy when you can!

Run the pharrell video on-going open a separate window.

9. Know thyself but remember we Are only human like everyone else composed of blood, sweat and tears.

Do you see the glass half full or half empty?

Are you an optimist or a pessimist?


Extroverted or introverted. Outgoing or private. Lets get active and separate the active from the passive recipients.

10. Exercise: the zen morning yell.

Now look at yourself and consider the person next to you “Are we yellers or are we horse whisperers?

Extroverts yell – Introverts whisper “In Public.” Get an introvert or an extrovert in a private setting and you may have the opposite. Our goal here is “to Know thyself.”

Reserved or rebellious. TAKE ACTION TAKE CONTROL.

Ask your self…What relaxes you and what relaxes most people.

Resolve – resolute – resolution. Re-solutions. The stress of the social contract and response perception.

This is about a Psychology of adjustment.

Re-Creation and Re-creational exercises. Re-Creative.

11. Exercise: affirmation.

Loretta LaRoche” I will release stress in a positive and healthy way of living.”

“Not how many breaths you take, it’s how often your breath is taken away.”

Lo The Psychology of Affirmations:

The little Engine that could and discovering your inner child or Bill Murrays baby steps.


I am in control of my life or life is in control of me or how about…. Like earning a college degree!

me and my life are engaged in pursuit of the opportunities and dreams around me.

12. The ENVIRONMENT/Nature

Nature vs. nurture: biology genetics and sex hormones. Environmental surroundings and nature. Wild child of aveyron and genie feral child. Alcoholics, religious zealots. family images.


deprived of outside and nature we become

shut-ins, a recluse, deprived of fresh air.

We are products of the environment and Our Flow our innate potential to live fully can be disrupted by inner toxins and mental anguish.

Our being human and a Holistic system composed of mind, body, emotions and spirit becomes a fragmented self.

So lets see how stress and our response to stress is an extension of our self.

Our Thoughts and emotions are stimulated by forces from outside. Reduce the thinking tension again what psychologists call thinking tension dissonance. Cognitive dissonance ie. thinking tension (should I go to work, should I go to class, shoud I do both, should I study or should I party, should I stay or should I go…should I turn my phone off or leave it on….the demands to assimilate and accommodate are STRESSFUL Arggghhhhhh!!!!!!!! Or Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

13. Visualization: can your imagination relax you? Lets see?

maybe maybe not.

I say life and the places we experience everyday is like a moving picture. Shakespeare’s “all the worlds a stage and we are but actors all of us, dressing up, showing up and acting up. The grand performance of Life and we are participants in some grand opera where we work, play, laugh, cry, love, lose and then wake up the next day and do it again until we drop…… dead

OPEN the following Site to show how relevant these Stress studies have become and review.

slouching vs. good posture.

14. Exercise: CatWalk. Styling and Profiling. The importance of posture for circulation.

taking a walk to relax.

Express yourself in body, style, gesture and voice.

SPIRITUALITY: people believe and have faith because it reduces stress. A critic of religion once stated that “religion was the opium of the people.”

Stress can leave us spinning out, spinning our wheels or in the case of the whirling dirvishes “spinning for God”

SWIRLING Dirvishes.

EXERCISE: ask volunteers to come to the stage for a Yoga spin. And explain the Tibetan art of spinning. As a yoga form.

Now create your own however outrageous poses.

We have shaken up our immune system.

15. Our Immune System

IMAGES and point out the stressors that are a day in the life.

Addiction is a habit and some activities are habit forming meaning while you may be enjoying your pleasures and satisfying your temptations you can become addicted. But these exercises we are engaging in are obviously stimulating enough. The real benefit is because we are “healthy” we show up for life, for others, for work and for fun. Success comes from practicing exercises and making the proactive decision to take care OF YOUR MIND AND BODY

Endorphins and dopamine.

Oxytocin and tear ducts.

Chemical imbalance and natural balance exercises:


16. Hugs Not Drugs

HUG video on Venice beach. Check the scroll down.

EXERCISE: Hug your neighbor - safely.

Exercise: make Heart symbols, hug videos in venice beach, think a wining event or a common achievement like rescuing a stranger out of a well. Now give each other a hug (if you can).

EXERCISE: Hug your neighbor - safely.

Exercise: make Heart symbols, hug videos in venice beach, think a wining event or a common achievement like rescuing a stranger out of a well. Now give each other a hug (if you can).

Sometimes We take ourselves to seriously and we have to learn to laugh at ourselves sometimes, just be ridiculous for a second or cultivate a genuine sense of humor.

17. LAUGHTER. Zen morning laugh.

Pessimist – pervasive (everything, all the time, everyone, I have been chosen, I am the victim), permanent, and personal.

Maybe whining and worst case scenarios are a subtle form of crying and its healthy….let me try.

My mom in the playground: don’t run………’re gonna die. So basically if you run you are going to kill yourself. Possible but highly unlikely. These folks created the ultimate comeback.

Mom,….Really? and it comes with a face. Now these folks have their place in our universe so enjoy them but they leave us scarred and confused. Should I run or not? Should I say something about this or not? So we stop everything we stop living we stop socializing because the possibility that I can die from running or opening my mouth could happen and …whats the adage…”better safe than sorry” well boo-hoo. That’s no fun…that’s hinging on potential cautious sheltered life and even depression.

An increase in SEROTONIN a decrease in DOPAMINE. Create your emotional language of happiness.

Have fun as often as you can because it doesn’t matter at the end.

It takes courage to be happy – WHining is easy.. it’s raining vs. …oh god it’s raining. Almost cathartic. When you feel that grumble…release…Pause…assess…Now talk.

Look and listen to your network. Are they your besties because they are always complaining and it makes you feel good.

Or better are you constantly complaining so that you don’t have to hear other people’s complaints, because by the time we hear your problems we are like, OMG and i thought I had it bad.

Limitations, Nature and biorhythms.

new commercial with the happy girl and grumpy boyfriend sharing an experience. Be bizzarre, be zany and add twenty years to your life.

Two men looked out of prison bars one saw mud the other saw stars.

Every cloud has a silver lining.

Abe lincoln – did not hire a man because he didn’t want to see his face all day. A permanent

look of disdain. Frown

today we can be happy and not be gay. Gay means homosexual.

18. Exercise: frown and then smile. now smile at the person sitting next to you

louie prima smiling, coca cola and corporate sponsors.

EXERCISE: Dance. Congaline.

The benefits of walking.

Namaste. Hakuna Matata. stress the experience of a perceived threat real or imagined to one's mental physical or spiritual well-being resulting from a series of physiological responses and adaptations. P' 3

Stress release videos. Sociology videos. MARRY ME NBC TUESDAY.

BIGData BIG Mind.

Life coaches. HARPERS. SHOUt

Closing Song. Enjoy!

Imagine dragons I’m on top of the world.

For further information on this subject and the related information and exercises feel free to contact me at: resources avaiable upon request.

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